never before seen!

I don't know why it matters to me so much, it really shouldn't, but whenever I post on my Instagram of myself too much...I delete it. The memories are sweet, and my kids are cute, I'm usually not just by myself, but for whatever reason, if I see that I'm appearing too often, I change my mind and never post it or delete it soon after. Welp, here are a few of those times, because they really are adorable...

oh the weather outside is...delightful!

Rainy days are just the best, ESPECIALLY when it's cold. I love that feeling of needing to bundle up. I assume that's because it's such a rarity here to feel this sort of chill, but I adore the chill. Even now, as everyone is in bed, I can hear the rain coming down and wish that I could be in bed too...mostly because my feet are frozen...

But I'm trying to maintain my goals, so here I am, blogging...

Speaking of goals, I have been hitting pretty much all my resolutions so far! High fives to me!

(...and I'm well aware we're only 20 days into the year, but I'm taking this as a victory BECAUSE I CAN. I need all the enthusiastic muster I can get!)

I've been surprising myself with how often I've been taking the kids outside! I think because the boys are older and can entertain themselves it's been far more pleasant (easier) for me. It's really hard to run after two boys and keep them alive! But now they have bikes and scooters and each other to have fun with. Livvy just likes to watch her brothers or play with rocks...or ask to hold my hand so we can go on a walk. Yes, she's that adorable.

I also got a hike done already this month! And with my bestie, no less! She's really good at finding new places to explore, which I suppose isn't hard when I've never hiked in the Superstitions...but it was BEAUTIFUL! If anyone has any good hike recommendations, send them my way!

It was ALSO rainy this day, but with perfect timing we missed the downpour! It was a perfect.

a little reintroduction

I feel like I'm starting in the middle of a story, instead of having that gradual introduction and steady familiarity with the characters and story line. Consequences of my lack of action, I suppose. 

So here's a bite-sized reintroduction...

Wyatt--the eldest, craziest, and most giggly--is in first grade now. He struggles with ADD, or ADHD, we're not sure which, though he for certain has it. Jeff doesn't want to have him tested [or labled] until it starts affecting his ability to function/learn in school. So far, thanks to his wonderful teachers, he has done well. He loves school most days, can read and write, and LOVES art and recess. 

Logan is our little thinker. He is also an instigator. He's a combination of sweet and sassy, heavy on the sassy sometimes. He is very creative--loves to draw, color, build Legos, and will sit and put together puzzles for hours. The only thing he loves more than those things...are Spider-Man and BB8. Or really, all things Marvel and Star Wars. He starts kindergarten in the fall and CANNOT wait. 

Olivia is everyone's favorite. I suppose the baby usually is, so it's okay to admit it, right?? She is the sunshine in our hearts, and she makes me want to squeeze her little body every chance I get. She's definitely decided she wants a say in...everything...so she is quickly learning the meaning of no--which is a very hard thing to go through. She loves puppies, coloring, looking at books, and going outside. 

As for Jeff and I, we're the same. Haha, but really, there's nothing much very new. I'm still at home with the babies while Jeff works hard to make our life comfortable and happy. We just recently had our ward split and we were moved into a newly created ward. So far we're liking it, though I've been put in primary, so I haven't met a ton of people. It's a nice area, and I know I'll make new friends....probably 😂 

That's it for now! 

New Year, New Resolutions

I haven't always enjoyed journaling, but since getting married and having children, it's been a lot easier, since, you know...my life isn't boring now. 

Hahahaha, well, I suppose that's subjective. But I don't think my life is boring. Repetitive maybe, but never boring...

ANYWAY, back to my original thought: journaling. My main process of journaling is through Instagram, but one of my New Year's resolutions is to journal through blogging more often. I haven't obviously been very good at this the last few years, but here I am again, ready to give it another try. 

I figured I'd start off by listing my resolutions for this upcoming year!!

(Because that's not boring, right?? 😂)

GOALS FOR TWO-THOUSAND SEVENTEEN

• READ SCRIPTURES  as a family every day
• Have FAMILY HOME EVENING regularly, if not every Monday night 
• EAT HEALTHY and EXERCISE REGULARLY (at least 2-3x a week)
• AVOID SOCIAL MEDIA while the kids are around
• GO OUTSIDE more, weather permitting (you know, because sometimes it's deathly hot here) 
• Go on FAMILY HIKES once a month
• Have PERSONAL PRAYERS and COUPLES PRAYERS every day
• ATTEND THE TEMPLE monthly
• READ one book a month
• BAKE something once a week
• PLAY more games
• JOURNAL often, including blogging
• WRITE Elder Van Capelle every Sunday 
• BE MORE KIND to others 
• Make Jeffrey a PRIORITY
• GO TO BED before (no later than) midnight 

And that's it!! 

I'm doing really well so far! Though...it is only the second week of the year, so I'll let you know in December how everything actually goes, haha! 

Wish me luck!

The rest of 2015

It's only been 6 months since I last posted.

ONLY 6 months.

As if that's not a lot of time...HA!

Life happened.

The rest of 2015 kind of flew by.

Without my permission.

And here we are, already in the new year.

Here's a recap of some of the things that have happened:

Olivia looks like a good combination of her brothers. More people vote she looks like Jeff. I keep hoping one of my kids will end up looking like me, but I guess I'm not that lucky. At least they're all ADORABLE, right?

 And on that note, Olivia is the cutest baby on the planet. I'm very sorry to anyone who tries to debunk it, but it's a fact.

A rare photo showing all three kids LOOKING at the camera and actually SMILING too! It's a MIRACLE, people.

Tender moments happened.

The one time I painted Livvy's toenails.

Also, she makes the best old lady faces.

Also, also...my boys are cuter than anyone elses' too, sooo...

Trying to take a selfie and failing miserably.

Please admire my luscious hair pre-post-pregnancy-shed. It all fell out. I am sad.

Olivia being cuter than I can handle. Look at that pumpkin!

Halloween was...interesting. The boys had fun. Livvy fell asleep. I'm too old for this stuff. But hey, we're cute!

Wyatt had a Primary Program and did GREAT! He's only been in Primary THREE years, and he FINALLY sat in his seat the whole way through, sang the songs, said his part in a legible manner, and didn't drive his primary teachers completely bonkers! Hallelujah. 

Again. With the cuteness.

On a separate, but similar train of thought, I have completely BOTCHED keeping up with her updates and stats and whatnot. Just know that she was sitting by 4 months, eating solids by 5 months, was crawling at 6 months, and finally cut her bottom 2 teeth at 7 months. Those are the major milestones, right?? Haha!

Jeff took me to a Monday night Cardinals game! It was part of his Christmas present and for whatever reason he invited me. It was fun. And crazy. Football fans are insane. (And to be honest, I'd rather watch football at home on a comfy couch with announcers who give play by play feedback, but don't tell him that!)

We went to Georgia as a whole family to visit Grace and James who moved out there for his job! It was a whirlwind move, and I was devastated, but I'm happy for them. Also, it's SO BEAUTIFUL there!

Exciting news: Logan was POTTY-TRAINED!!

And my oldest baby turned SIX?!

Oh yeah, and he started Kindergarten, whaaaat?

He had a rough transition, and still has some hard days, but is altogether doing very well. 

Sometimes we look really cute so I force my family to take a million outtakes to get one good picture. Totally worth it.

I spend a lot of time in Wyatt's classroom, and I love it.

Part of the whole school experience is...school concerts! He was ADORABLE!!!

We still have to go to church without Daddy sometimes.

It's hard.

But the boys love church, so I'm glad we go.

I ACTUALLY DECORATED MY TREE THIS YEAR.

::highfive::

Last year I was deathly ill with pregnancy and so it literally sat there for two months with no decorations and was very sad. 

The boys were so impressed though, and pretty much told anyone who would listen about all the decorations on our tree.

Christmas and New Years came and was gone in the blink of an eye, and now we're already in 2016. Hopefully I can post more than twice this year...

...I'm not making any promises, but I'll try.

Enjoy that recap!

Baby Blessing

Olivia's Blessing Day: May 24th, 2015

I love all these pictures, but I was a little scatterbrained that day. If I would've been thinking correctly I could've had a group picture taken, of everybody. But alas, I wasn't that smart.

It also didn't help that half our group had to leave before sacrament meeting was over, so they weren't able to be there for pictures. Also, had I been thinking at all, we could've taken another picture at the dinner when we all reconvened...gaaaah!

Oh well.

It was a beautiful blessing nonetheless, and thankfully little Olivia didn't make a peep. We are immensely blessed to have our families so close to us.

Four generations of girls!

(this is what most of the 'photoshoot' looked like, haha!)

And here's a comparison to all our other baby blessings! It's crazy to see our family grow!

{the birth}

If you're one of those people who read everything there is to read on pregnancy (like I am), then you know it's pretty common and mostly unanimous that as disclaimer to everything,

"every pregnancy is different."

For some reason I had it in my head that phrase was referencing women in general--that every woman has a different pregnancy from every other woman. As if that's not obvious, I never supposed it could apply to each one of my individual pregnancies--that they would each be different. DUH. 

Well, I am here to say:
EVERY PREGNANCY IS DIFFERENT.

Especially the labor part.

So with Wyatt, I assumed because my body had never gone through a labor and delivery before, that was why I never dilated more than 1cm in a month and why I never had any pre-labor symptoms.

That thought was confirmed by me when, with Logan, I progressed in dilation each week up to my delivery, and went into labor on my own two days early.

But then with this little girl, I was back to square one. The four weeks leading up to my due date, I dilated only 2cm and remained at 70% effaced the whole time. I even had my membranes stripped twice (once a week before my due date, and the other, the day before my due date) and neither time started labor! I didn't even have regular braxton hicks contractions, though, when I did have them they were pretty strong. Overall it was just really depressing. My doctor asked if I was interested in being induced and I let him go ahead and schedule an induction date for her due date, May 12th. At least I could say she was born right on time!

MAY 12th 2015
My induction was scheduled for 9am and my doctor had advised me to call the hospital beforehand to make sure they had a room for me. I was convinced every other pregnant woman would go into labor on that day just to prevent me from having my baby. Thankfully, a tender mercy was thrown my way and they told me I could come in. I spent the morning getting everyone ready and by some miracle we arrived at the hospital early. I say miracle because I was sure we were going to be late and, again, I would miss my chance to have a baby. Seriously. I was super paranoid.
But no worries, they let me in!

Since I've been induced before, this wasn't anything new to me. I knew what to expect, and what I expected, happened. There were a few new twists though--apparently I tested positive for Group B strep, so I had to wait on the induction to start until after I'd had two doses of antibiotics. Also, when I was finally started on the pitocin, and after my water had been broken, and after I received my epidural...it didn't fully take. Getting my epidural this time was a lot more painful than I remember before, and that could be because every other time I was in the throes of painful contractions, whereas this time I knew to ask for it before the pain was unbearable. Anyway, the epidural numbed my entire lower half, like it should, except for one spot on my lower abdomen, right above my pubic bone--where I could feel the contractions most excellently...in a not excellent way. So my nurses positioned my legs in a way they thought would more evenly distribute the epidural, but after 20 minutes, and still no change, they upped my dosage. And after another 20 minutes with no change, they called the anesthesiologist back in, and he gave me some lidocaine.

I was COMPLETELY numb in no time.

SO numb, in fact, I was worried I wouldn't be able to push. My other epidurals left some feeling, enough that I could still feel the pressure from my contractions, but THIS epidural left me dead from the hips down.

My mom and sister joined Jeff and I in the delivery room shortly after my epidural. I should mention that at the time of my epidural (I feel like I'm saying "epidural" a lot and it's starting to sound funny) I was checked and had only dilated to 3cm. This was around 2pm, and so when everyone started sending in their guesses for weight, length and time of birth, the consensus was I'd be there well into the night...

I, on the other hand, knew once I relaxed and took a nap, I'd be ready to push in no time...which is why my guess was only minutes away from her actual birth time, and well ahead of most other guesses. So there.

Back to the real story...
After my epidural was fully functioning, my nurse had me lie on one side with the birthing peanut for an hour and then turned me onto my other side for another hour, supposedly to help with my contractions and to open up my cervix. After that last hour (around 5pm) she checked me and announced I was ready! I was a little shocked and thought she was joking until she told me she could see the head crowning. And then, as she and Jeff were positioning me into the stirrups (because I was numb and couldn't help in any way) we had to stop halfway because apparently Olivia wanted to come out right then and there! She joked and told me to cross my legs to keep her inside. Then she called for my doctor and asked if the doctor on-call was available because I. WAS. READY. Thankfully my doctor's office is right across from the hospital, so he was there in no time. And as soon as he was suited up, I "pushed" a few times (and literally could not feel a thing) and she basically fell out! Olivia May Downs was born on her due date, May 12th at 5:37pm, weighing 8lbs 12oz and 21.5 inches long. She was beautiful and pink and had a head full of hair!

(I didn't tear, but my doctor gave me one stitch to help a stretch mark heal quicker. I didn't have to take any pain medication except ibuprofen to help with the after birth pains, that is, the contractions that shrink the uterus [and they were PAINFUL!]. We only stayed in the hospital until the next night, and had lots of visitors.)

First thing both boys did as soon as they held her was to give her a kiss...

The grandmas are trying to distinguish what features she gets from whom...
...and who knows what Ben is doing.

Oh hey guys! I just had a baby!